It is really important in this mad age of consumerism to discuss, openly, the nature of the things we buy; it has made me consider why I aspire to live so minimally.
I would like to share with you some thoughts I have on the matter and share some of my most treasured possessions as well as the reasons why I have chosen to keep them.
Have you ever stopped to ask yourself why you buy the things you buy? I would like to assume that I was like most people before I moved to Japan; I bought things quite frivolously and didn't really give much thought or consideration as to why.
I nestled a snow pea flower from my mother's garden in my favourite 九谷 (Kutani) vase this morning and set it next to a painting that I bought before returning from Japan. A memento for a better future.
The truth is, I felt incredibly insecure after and whilst growing up. It was incredibly difficult to be any other way with the experience of being bullied in school, my father leaving me when I was born, not fitting in so much at home and being raised gay in a world where it didn't seem there was a place for me.
With hindsight, I can see now that this embedded a deep insecurity that I felt could be masked by acquiring lots of stuff; surely people wouldn't see what a terrible person I thought I was if I had a fancy new coat or the latest iPhone?
How wrong I was. I'm so glad that I see things differently now and this process of recovery and rehabilitation has made me learn so much about myself and how strong I can really be during dark times; you can too I am certain; more importantly, it has shown me how loved and accepted I am.
Living for nearly a year without the majority of things: without a room to call my own, moving from a hospital room to residential rehabilitation and now my mother's home has really made one thing evident; all of the happiness and the joy that I have experienced over the past eleven or so months was based on the people in my life and not the things that were in my room, wardrobe, bank account etc.
I feel like I have finally gained insight now that I would like the things in my life to represent the tapestry of souls that I have met and how grateful I am to them for making my life richer and more beautiful.
Here are some of the things I decided to bring back with me and the memory tied to them:
I purchased this bag on my trip to Tokyo in 2023 from my good friend Jinmon san. Not only am I incredibly grateful to him for so graciously taking me under his wing and teaching me many things with regards to sewing and accessory making but there was a time when I thought that I had done something to upset him.
This purchase was not only a way of saying a huge thank you to him and supporting his designs and business but also as a reminder of our friendship and trust in each other.
It is also pertinent for me to remember not to let my assumptions and 'runaway-train-brain' get out of hand. I should wait until I have all the facts at hand and then make an informed decision. Sure I experienced a lot of anxiety in childhood but I don't need to let my 'child-brain' be so active in my adult life.
These three stones were a recent addition to my collection. They were completely free; I collected them from Hengistbury Head (a stony beach in Dorset) on one of my final physiotherapy sessions. Not only did I pick them for their beauty but to remind me of how far I have come in my journey and how strong and resilient I have been.
I stacked them, one on top of the other, to show how connected everything is and to remind me of the importance of balance and not overdoing it (especially post- brain injury). Occasionally, the top one will tumble off and I am learning to just put it back calmly and remember that, much like my car accident, bad things will happen in life but the importance lies in how you respond to them. I have found, personally, that it is they key to my happiness.
These are mushroom chopstick rests (お箸置き) by Kyoko Suzuki one of my friends based in Tokyo. I remember finding her studio CLAYPOT near Yoyogi park whilst going for a stroll one day. Our shared interest in mushrooms and the use of bright colours made me an instant fan of her work. It was no accident that I stumbled upon her and her work.
I place these on the windowsill and the way they reflect the light brings me a lot of joy knowing that I have wonderful friends, though miles apart. They also remind me of how serendipitous life can be and I look forward to making more friends and finding out what life has in store for me.
Incense that a friend gifted me when I was living in Sazazuka (笹塚). Yuri san was one of my students at that time. Every time I burn this incense, the scent instantly transports me to my time spent living in Tokyo, especially my residence back then.
The quaint 2LK apartment that I shared with a close friend will always be one of my fondest memories as we often had friends over for parties and jovial get togethers.
On reflection, there has never been an area that I disliked living in; all the places had their own special charm or merit and this reminds me of where I have come from. The addition of the mindful practice of using such incense is a huge plus and I hope to stock it at SANCHA some time in the near future.
Thank you for reading this blog post.
It was wonderfully nostalgic to reminisce about my favourite days in Tokyo as well as remind myself of the importance of why I have invested in these items and chosen to include them in my life.
It was also wonderful to be able to write such a personal post and blogging is something that I have been wanting to do for a while. Perhaps being so vulnerable and baring a small part of my soul will make it much easier to do in the future. Why was I making it much scarier that it actually has been? Child-brain I guess.
Perhaps you might use this opportunity to assess the things in your life and consider how much they mean to you. What is that famous saying? Ah... 'Less in more.'
If you enjoyed this post or have any suggestions on what you would like to hear about. Be sure to get in touch.
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